Lately I’ve been very deep in the Psalms. I love the Psalms because they’re so honest and real, and they don’t beat around the bush. I continue to go back to them over and over again.
I read through Psalm 51 early this morning and prayed it as I read:
Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!
For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment.
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin did my mother conceive me.
- Psalm 51:1-5
If I’m honest, sometimes I get weary of having to pray this all the time. I get weary of needing to admit I haven’t arrived yet or haven’t overcome a particular sin or I’m not fixed. Sometimes I just want to be done. I want this sanctification process to be over, because that would be far easier and far more comfortable than knowing God still has more He needs to do in my life.
Unfortunately, I’ll never be able to say this side of heaven that God is done with me, that He won’t continue to reveal sin in my life and that He won’t continue to recognize the transgressions I make. It is a continual challenge to cultivate a life that honestly goes before the Lord and honestly shares those things with others. It’s also a challenge to be reminded of what God has done for me already and live in those truths.
As hard as it can be, Psalm 51 was a good reminder that God’s Word provides an opportunity for us to respond to Him with our lives. May we learn to be honest and confessional before the Lord and before each other, and cultivate a culture of that in our church.